Gabriels Birth

The birth of my Son

I haven't written on here for a while. Been super busy lately. My baby was born last week finally and I would like to share what happened. 

Thursday morning:

My contractions started at 3:00 Thursday morning. I woke up and had to go to the bathroom and realized I was having contractions. I started to time them and realized they were consistent. At 5:30am I called my midwife and she told me I was in labor. My husband and I were having the birth at a birthing center. I woke shea up and told him he needed to stay home from work. 

At around 10:30am we went over to the birthing center and our midwife said I was only 3cm dilated. So we decided to come back home and wait it out for a few hours. At 5:30pm we went back over the birthing center because the contractions were worse. Being in labor is not fun. The contractions makes it feel like every bone in your body is breaking at once. I had severe back labor and every time a contraction started it felt like my back was going to break with every one. We were there over night and it was the longest night I had ever experienced. I couldn't sleep, I was throwing up, my body was in pain and there wasn't anything I could do about it. 

Friday:

Friday morning finally came and I had only progressed to about 5cm. The contractions were still there and were still consistent. My husband was exhausted and so was I. 

I was progressing really slowly and my baby wasn't moving down to open my cervix. I tried everything I could to get that baby down. I walked the stairs, I walked the birthing center, I took showers, I labored with my chest down and butt up, I sat in the birthing tub to try and help the back labor ease up; but nothing was helping. 

At about 2:00pm I finally hit 7cm! We were so happy cuz that meant delivery was coming soon! Or so we thought. 

Friday evening:

At about 5:30pm I was still at 7cm. My baby's head was no where near coming down. I was beyond exhausted and I was starting to swell down there (which doesn't help the baby). We were starting to get worried because I had gone hours with no progression. I couldn't do it anymore and we decided to go to the hospital to get an epidural. Around 6:00pm we arrived at the hospital and they got me settle in. I was still at 7cm and the doctors decided to break my water. I received the epidural and It helped for about 15 mins but after that the pain was way more intense. I went until about 8 or 9:00 with still no progression before we had to do an emergency C-Section. My baby was doing fine through all this but I was so exhausted that I couldn't carry on anymore as I had been in labor for almost 50 hours. The doctors and midwife think that my baby's head was a little cockeyed and that was why he wasn't moving down. 

Baby is born!:

At 10:00pm Friday night they took me to the surgery room where they gave me 3 spinal shots to numb from my chest down to my toes. The feeling you get afterward is something I cannot explain. I could feel pressure on my tummy and legs  from the doctors but it was like nothing was there. My husband sat next to my head and held my hand as they cut me open and removed my baby. 

At 11:03pm Gabriel James McNeil was born. He weighed 8lbs 7oz and was 21in long. As soon as I heard my baby cry every pain I had went away for a moment. Every tear I cried washed away. My heart was filled with happiness and joy and love! Every contraction was worth it. Shea got to hold Gabriel first and he got to cut the cord. My bundle of joy that I carried for 9 months and labored for almost 50 hours was finally here. 

Thoughts/emotions  afterward:

I will be honest about how my thoughts/emotions are now that it's all over. 

The birth did not go as planned. We wanted to have a home birth not a hospital birth. Do I think maybe I could have done something different to prevent what had happened? Yes. But I don't know. Yes I could have walked more. Yes I could have drank more (as I was really dehydrated). But honestly who knows if that would have changed it. Yes I wonder if I did something wrong. I wonder why this happened to me. I will have a scar for the rest of my life. I'm not sure I will be having another kid for while because this was pretty traumatizing for both Shea and I. I was scared that during the surgery my body would give out and not want to carry on any longer. I was scared something would happen to my baby. 

I could look at this as something bad. Or I could look at this as a gift. My baby is happy and healthy. This scar will remind me of the work I went through to bring this wonderful boy into the world. My body is healing well. I'm up and moving but still taking it easy. 

God gave me this little boy to love, take care of, cherish and To keep safe. God picked me and Shea to raise this little child. I will always love Gabriel with all my heart and I will always put him first no matter what. He has made my heart happy.